time.
she takes it all. but mostly, she takes our youth and my ability to sit in every moment.
I remember being 8 or 9 years old and time just inched along. summers stretched so far that my mind was ready for the days of school structure. once that came along, the countdown to christmas was like watching sand pass through an hour glass. eternity.
then something wildly crazy happens, right before my eyes, all of that lands behind me.
25 years ago I was 10 years old - which I truly remember like it was yesterday. in the time it takes to blink, i’m transported back to Quarters T-1 - making movies, picking berries in the woods, and selling snow cones on the corner to every Marine that hopefully ran by. I remember what I wore, the name of our neighbor’s parrot, the sailing instructor I fell madly in love with (at 11! lol) and how brutally aware I was of turning a decade old. as I blew out my 10 candles, I knew I would never be a single digit again. and I remember such a feeling of sadness falling over me. maybe a lot of us felt this way? or was it just me? i’ve always been hyperly focused on life, and our world, even at a young age. and still to this day it takes no effort to go back in my mind. effortless, exciting, and sad. how could that have been 25 years ago?
it get’s crazier. when I look 25 years ahead, I will be 60. SIXTY. FULL STOP. it’s not the number that scares the shit out of me, it’s that the time i’ve lived already - double that up, and it will go even quicker this time around. maybe there will be a couple babies sprinkled in there, no doubt a full petting zoo, but how in the world do I make sure to capture these next 25 years before they too get away from me? i’m not sure, other than try my best to love those around me, travel the world, and be thankful for each day.
I really didn’t think through what I would type out here (i’m sure it’s quite obvious!) these are all just thoughts as they come from my dome to the keyboard. we do our best to stay in the moment, and remind ourself to jump back into them when we can. the thief will always be here - but lucky for me, I keep hard copies of every year in my memories <3